Dear Dream Queens,
I feel we are all constantly evolving and changing. We are learning from our experiences and moving forward. Recently I had to sit in my emotions and allow them to flow. It seems many times pushing feelings to the side and pushing forward is the right thing to do. Wanting to keep everything flowing and doing what I am supposed to do. I have found that giving myself the grace and time has made me more productive and better focused. I have learned that sometimes you need to scream cry and eat a pint of ice cream. Do you ever feel that way? Like you just want to dig a hole and cry in it? Well I say let yourself. That does not mean we get to live in the hole only that we need a layover in the hole to truly understand where we are and where we stand with in any situation. I feel as a woman knowing I have immense feelings and emotions and empathy, and a giant heart is an advantage to leading but if I don’t take care of those and learn what to express and what to withhold it will all come spilling out and bubble to the surface.
As leaders we are faced with living by example. As business owners, parents, and community members we are trying to put on our best face to the world but what if our vulnerability is what the world needs to see? At our last two meetings with the Northern Calvert and the Charles County Women’s Networking groups I told my story. I told all the things that I wish I could hide but that I know is very important to who I am as a person. With so many sad things happening in our world and the ongoing isolation that we are experiencing I feel many of us feel alone in what we are experiencing. Asking, what is wrong with me? Why can’t I be strong? Why does everyone around me have it figured out? And don’t get me started on Facebook.
On Facebook I try to portray the best of myself in all aspects of my life. That does not mean that nothing is happening, I feel Facebook is a public place for a public face. This is where we come in as Dream Queens. We are a support system all our own. We come together monthly to learn from each other, to be authentic and to be supportive. The authenticity we share in our spaces is uncommon and I dare say frowned upon by the general ‘networking’ world.
My message to you this month is YOU ARE NOT ALONE! You are worthy, powerful, and unique. Your journey is your own and shouldn’t be compared to anyone else. Be your true authentic self as much as you possibly can around those you want to do business with. People can smell fake and know when someone is truly who they say they are. Do not hide behind a mask of what you feel people want to see. They want to see you. I know you and to trust you.
The last few months have been difficult to say the least. I have experienced betrayal from the person I trusted the most in the world. My reality had to shift, and my emotions had to adapt. I went through all the stages of grief and am still working through them. I appreciate the time we share in our rooms so that I could express fully what I was experiencing and finding strength in those who had a similar experience in their journey. Knowing I’m not alone and this will pass in time has been all I could hold onto at times.
I joke and tell people ‘you are not special’- You are not the first one to experience loss, divorce, career changes, money issues, and the plethora of other issues we as humans. What makes us special is who we decide to be on the other side of these uncontrollable circumstances. Our decisions define us. We can regret and mourn about the past. We can worry and chew our nails about the future. What we all only have is the present, as they say ‘it is a present’. I am choosing to be the best I can be in the moments I am living them. I am choosing to know what my heart and mind need as I move forward. I am choosing to share as much of myself with you as possible so that you will know the true authentic person that I am. I am choosing our Gals Lead Program and Dream Queen Networking. I am choosing each of you.
I hope my words have given you a bit of comfort and that you will share the message of the Dream Queens with your community. We are positive, passionate, purpose filled women who come together to support each other, to share our dreams, to overcome our obstacles, and to help the next generation of women to be their best selves.
